"Validity Claims" By Martin Ucik

According to social philosopher Jürgen Habermas*, all human actions (which Gandhi says become our habits, values and destiny), are always primarily coordinated by speech or language use. Whenever humans use language to coordinate their love relationships, they enter into certain commitments to justify their words and actions on the basis of their thoughts and beliefs. Habermas calls these commitments that justify our words and actions "validity claims". He argues that any sincere speech-act makes three different validity claims: A validity claim to objective truth. What can be proven outside an individuals subjective feelings, thoughts, imaginings, ideas or interpretations. A validity claim to ethical or moral rightness. Ethical refers to what is good/bad for me, us, and all of us, and is based on relative and conditional values. Moral is what is right/wrong and caring/uncaring, based on norms of what is just/unjust, responsible/irresponsible, and absolute/unconditional (see Kohlberg's stages of moral development that are interwoven below.) A validity claim to subjective truthfulness. Do the speakers really mean what they say or are they lying to themselves or others. The four questions and turnarounds from Byron Katie's "the work" come to mind. (1) Is it true? (2) Can I absolutely know that this is true? (3) How do I react, what happens, when I believe that thought/feeling? (4) Who would I be without the thought/feeling? Spiritual development through meditation and shadow work are essential for developing increasing capacities for truthfulness. We can only make ourselves understood, and engage in meaningful conversations with our partner and others (e.g. friends or a therapist/coach) if we presuppose and believe that all participants are truthful and say what is both right and true. As we know from Ken Wilber's Integral Model, beliefs, including those about love relationships, that underlie our validity claims change as we grow in consciousness. Understanding validity claims at different levels of consciousness and how we deal with conflicts is therefore vital for co-creating healthy sustainable love relationships. At the magical level we believe in love relationships as we know them from fairy tails and Disney movies. The purpose of love is to be enchanted and to live happily ever after with "The One". There is little to no capacity for understanding or accepting objective truths; morality is understood in terms of punishment and obedience, and the avoidance of harm to self and others; truthfulness is limited to expressing simple feelings such as "I am sad, scared, happy etc." The answer to questions is often "because". Conflicts are resolved by walking away or giving in. At the egocentric level we believe that love (and sex) is something that we are entitled to and can demand (see The Rules or The Game). The purpose of a love relationships is to get all our needs met by our partner. Objective truth is whatever we believe to be true without giving evidence, and those who disagree are wrong and deserve to be shamed and punished; morality is understood as a way of satisfying one's own interests and letting others do the same; truthfulness is based in "that's the way I think and feel and it is the only way to feel and think about this situation ... period." Conflicts are solved by arguing and fighting, and whoever gives up first was wrong and loses (winning the argument, losing the relationship). At the mythic/conformist level we believe that love is an action and duty (see Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus). The purpose of love relationships is to create stable families and communities to raise children in. Objective truth is derived from a higher authority (he/she/they say so) and can't be questioned; morality is understood as being good by following rules, meeting expectations, and showing concern for others; truthfulness is associated with being honest (though shalt not lie) and to say what is considerate, honorable, caring and kind (love thy neighbor as you love yourself). Conflicts are resolved by referring and submitting to the higher authority, e.g. the man/father, commander, superior, law or scripture. At the rational level we believe that feelings of love are generated by hormones through sexual and intellectual chemistry (shared values, interests, lifestyles and goals) and when we act romantically towards each other (see Why we Love or Falling In Love). The purpose of love relationships is for partners to support each other in realizing their highest dreams for optimal health, wealth, success and happiness through education and psychological strategies. Objective truth is derived from empirical scientific evidence that is acquired by means of observation or experimentation; morality means fulfilling one's duties, maintaining the social order, and the welfare of the society or group that one is part of; truthfulness is based in calculating the risks and benefits of revealing thoughts and feelings based on one's goals and objectives. Conflicts are resolved by separating people from the problem, focusing on interests and not positions, being soft on the people and hard on the problem, inventing options for mutual gain/win-win, using objective criteria and not feelings, focusing on the solution and not the problem, and positive thinking. At the pluralistic level we believe that love is unconditional and a path to higher consciousness and spiritual realization when we are with our soul-mate, celibate or with multiple lovers, depending on the state that we are in (see Love and Awakening or The Future of Love). The purpose of love is to heal and to awaken in order to experience an ever deeper sexual, emotional and spiritual connection. Objective truth does not exist and everything is relative and constructed by the presence, perspective and interpretation of the observer; morality is conceived as the basic rights, values and legal contracts of a group or society and based in universal laws, even when they conflict with the concrete rules and laws of a higher authority or majority opinion; truthfulness is to authentically express our thoughts, feelings and needs as well as our perception of others as long as it is loving, kind and necessary. Conflicts are resolved through non-violent/compassionate communication, in which observations, feelings, needs and requests are expressed, and empathy is shown by guessing others feelings, needs and desires. At the integral level we believe that love includes all the healthy aspects of the previous levels and serves an evolutionary purpose (see Integral Relationship, A Manual for Men). The purpose of love relationships is to heal, learn and grow to serve an authentic evolutionary purpose that is greater than either individual and provides the highest good for the largest number of people by balancing feminine and masculine polarities in all four quadrants ("I", "We", "It" and "Its") at the level of all the seven chakras. objective truth depends on validity claims (see above), different verification methods, and different experiences that are all actually reconcilable, mutually enriching, and already all present in a world spacious enough to house them all (Wilber); morality is based on the validity of underlying universal principles of equality, justice, care and dignity for all human beings into which any rational person has an insight to; truthfulness is based in the inter-subjective we-space with an awareness of various forms of the unconscious (we can't know what we don't know about) including shadow and the subject/object split. Conflicts are resolved by understanding that everybody is right from their own perspective, considering developmental lines in all the four quadrants (objective, subjective, individual and collective) and focusing on competencies, functionality, flexibility, creativity and flow. I am curious about your thoughts and experiences around this topic? Please reply to this email or post at www.facebook.com/integralrelationship. Visit www.integralrelationship.com for the following resources to co-create an Evolutionary Integral Relationship:

"Transformation and Regeneration!"By Nick Antony!

The May 10, 2013 Lunar Planner Transformation & Regeneration Partnerships: Entering New Territory May 10, 2013 - June 8, 2013 Lunar Planner Synopsis Our New Moon of May 10, 2013 produces an Annular Solar Eclipse, the middle eclipse of our threesome—the previous Full Moon’s Partial Lunar Eclipse and this Full Moon’s Prenumbral Eclipse. The annular part of this eclipse is visible in an extraordinarily wide swath through Australia—a double treat for those in Australia.... The Full Moon Eclipse is visible in the Americas and western Africa. Our New Moon lies in late sidereal Aries at the hind of the Ram, also conjoining the asteroid Pallas. Conjoining stars include: Ruchbah of Cassiopeia; the Quasar 3C66A in Andromeda; and Botein of Aries. This area of sidereal Aries is of transformation and regeneration. It is primal, creative and inventive, but can also be volatile and eruptive, with need to channel our energy. It requires that we surrender the very attitude about what we want, to attain what we want. Be prepared for another intense and catalytic lunar cycle. Two major events occur throughout this lunar cycle. One event is the third of seven exact squares in the 2012-2015 Uranus-Pluto Square. The asteroid Vesta and Comet ISON move into position to create a Vesta-ISON-Uranus-Pluto T-square, adding to this dynamic. Aside from the unique energetic created by the T-square and Comet ISON's stimulus and message, Vesta brings attention to our focus, dedication and commitment to achieve the changes we want in our lives—do we have it? The second prominent event is the Juno Lunar Nodes T-Square. This brings an emphasis and focus to relationships of all types, or should I say, to the resonance created by the issues and ideals within self that formulate the relations we draw and the nature of our experience in our relationships. It impels a need to address these issues in order to move forth into more fulfilling experience. This T-square’s energetic is a direct part of this eclipse theme stimulating relationships to break ground into new territory and to claim a new level of mutual freedom and fulfillment. There are many triggers throughout this lunar cycle to both of the above events that continue to emphasize and catalyze their effects. There are several other dynamic events occurring in this lunar cycle as well. For example, the Crescent Moon’s conjunction with Comet ISON; Comet ISON prominent aspects with the Uranus-Pluto Square from the Crescent Moon through First Quarter Moon; and a "Triple T-Square Full Moon Eclipse." Take hold as things accelerate into a greater climatic transition over the months ahead. This Synopsis continues on the Lunar Planner Home Page: http://www.lunarplanner.com/

"Eclipse Meaning and Viewing Options"By Carol Anne Ciococo

Eclipse Viewing Opportunities TOTAL ECLIPSE VIEWING On the morning of Friday May 10, in locations east of the International Date Line, the Annular Eclipse in its totality will be seen over Australia, Papua New Guinea and the Solomon Islands. PEOPLE AT THESE LOCATIONS WILL HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO SEE (weather permitting) THE RING OF FIRE EFFECT. In these locations, the moon in its Annular totality will obscure 95% of the sun's disk. The coveted Ring of Fire sought by eclipse viewers the world over will pop into view, as the dark Moon becomes completely surrounded by the brilliant light of the distant Sun. See the picture at right - this is an animation of the complete annular event, which lasts approximately 2-3 hours. The actual Ring of Fire will last for 109 seconds. For an animation of the eclipse over the earth, go to http://ow.ly/kQarN The shadow of the eclipse first touches down over the Northern Territory of Australia, a bit to the east of the small settlement of Newcastle Waters. Soon after, the central part of the eclipse shadow will strike the Earth in the Pilbara Region of Western Australia on the east side of Collier Range National Park. The nearest major town is Newman, a modern mining community of about 4,200. Australia Western Standard Time will be 6:31am on May 10 and, if the skies are clear, residents will witness "a most unusual sunrise" Note: witnessing an Annular eclipse in its most awe-inspiring form occurs at sunrise. I.e. while annular solar eclipses lack the extreme drama of a total solar eclipse (when the solar corona becomes visible and day turns to night), they nonetheless provide a dramatic view - and are especially spectacular at sunrise or sunset when framed against a landscape. Those in the town of Newman or nearby (which is where many eclipse chasers will be!) will witness this "most unusual sunrise": "at 6:31am local time on May 10, 2013, those gathering in the area will see the sun will emerge into view from beyond the east-northeast horizon. It will first resemble a pair of lobster claws and then when in full view, a horseshoe with upturned pointed tips. Finally with the dark disk of the Moon appearing to move down as opposed to the Sun moving up and off-centered "ring of fire" materializes, sitting just above the horizon. This wonderfully weird effect lasts 109 seconds, ending when the ring appears to "break" at the Sun's lower limb. Within minutes the Sun again resembles a horseshoe, but now the pointed tips are directed downward." - Guy Ottewell Here are the exact times of the eclipse experience in the Pilbara Region, east of Collier Range National Park, with the nearest town being Newman: On the morning of Friday May 10 (i.e. east of the International Date Line): Partial eclipse begins: 5:27 am Annular eclipse begins: 6:31 am Maximum eclipse: 6:32 am Annular eclipse ends: 6:34 am Partial eclipse ends: 7:48 am Go to the following link for details on other viewing times of Annular totality of this eclipse in Australia - some of the locations will also see a sunrise annular eclipse. (You will also find here some cautions for how to view a solar eclipse without harming your eyes): http://earthsky.org/tonight/annular-solar-eclipse-for-australia-after-sunrise-may-10 PARTIAL ECLIPSE VIEWING A Partial eclipse will be seen in a much broader path, which includes a large swath of Australia, as well as Indonesia, Oceania and much of the central Pacific Ocean. Hawaii will be the only state in the United States to see (weather permitting) this eclipse. The eclipse will be partial - the moon will cover 36% of the sun - and it will look like a horseshoe or like lobster claws (see picture at right). The eclipse will be seen in the afternoon/early evening on Thursday May 9. The eclipse will last approximately 2-3 hours. If you are in Hawaii you can see this eclipse in its partial form at these times: On the afternoon/evening of Thursday, May 9 (west of the International Date Line) Honolulu, Hawaii Partial eclipse begins: 2:24 pm Maximum eclipse: 3:48 pm Partial eclipse ends: 5:01 pm Go to this link for other locations and viewing times for seeing this eclipse in its partial form: http://earthsky.org/tonight/solar-eclipse-over-wide-stretch-of-pacific-ocean-on-may-910?#local-times Eclipse Spiritual Expansion Opportunities The best way to experience an eclipse is in person - especially Annular and Total Solar eclipses, which are rare events. However, most of us can't get to the location(s) of the eclipse and so the second best way to experience an eclipse is by tuning in to the eclipse energies in our consciousness. I find that meditation of any kind, as well as ritual/ceremony, or other group/individual spiritual work, is a wonderful method for tapping into the 'message' of an eclipse. The path of any eclipse tells a tale, especially Annular and Total Solar eclipses. These eclipses are like a spotlight or "cosmic eye" that is casting its gaze on specific places which resonate with specific energies. With its glance, the eclipse (i.e. the sun and moon) suddenly lights up important themes critical for the time of the eclipse (as well as at least 30 days before and 30 days after). Since this is a Ring of Fire eclipse, we are entering a sacred portal of purification, healing, heat and light. The newsletter I sent several days ago contained very detailed information concerning the path of this eclipse (for more in-depth inquiry, that newsletter can be found here: http://ow.ly/kQ2yS ) The eclipse points to several topics for meditation and contemplation, as described below. NOTE: if you miss the exact times of the eclipse, its effects last for at least 30 days afterward, so you can do your meditation at any time in the month to follow. The May 9/10, 2013 eclipse path reveals the following themes: (1) The Pleiades, and the Pleiadean Annular Ring of Fire eclipse on May 20, 2012. My newsletter on that eclipse can be found here: http://ow.ly/kvzBb (2) The potent Total Solar Eclipse, also over Australia, on November 13/14, 2012. My newsletter on that eclipse can be found here: http://ow.ly/kQiHv (3) The ancient origins of the earth, dating back 4.5 billion years, which can be found in Zircon crystals at Jacks Hills in Western Australia. This is potent and primordial energy, which takes us on a journey into DEEP TIME, pulling us out of our mundane consciousness so that we can truly understand where we come from - the origins of life on earth. Zircon w74 is The Earliest Piece of Earth (http://ow.ly/kI7UK) and so it is a library with the earth's entire history encoded in it, not unlike the Akashic Records. (4) The energy of the planet's first breaths, the breathing of the biosphere, and aligning our breath with it. (5) The ancient baked bones of the vast Red Centre of Australia, where the heartbeat of the earth has been recorded deep in the rocks for billions of years. This primordial information was intuited by the Aborigines, one of the First Peoples of the earth, who stepped foot onto land 50-60,000 years ago. (6) The Wurubunga Aboriginal tribe, its music and its unique vibration, especially as expressed in the area of the "Devil's Marbles" in the Tanami desert. THE MUSIC AT THIS LINK IS A BEAUTIFUL SOUNDTRACK FOR YOUR ECLIPSE EXPERIENCE: http://vimeo.com/30259252 (Shellie Morris & the Yanyuwa Songwomen with the Gondwana Children's Choir) And an exquisite mantra for this eclipse is: Don't be frightened, come in. - a Warumunga Aboriginal saying (7) The Grey Falcon, a ghostly elusive bird which initiates us into inaccessible realms and calls us into the mysteries of life on earth. It reveals the unknowable to those who are still, quiet and listening. It beckons us into right relationship and partnership, and into accelerated velocity in our spiritual evolution, as well bringing lightning-fast bursts of higher consciousness energies. (8) The need for healing of women and the Divine Feminine in Papua New Guinea. This in reference to the dark, barbaric practices of cannibalism (in the past); and the shocking and atrocious modern-day witch burnings which are taking place NOW in this location. Focus of healing on this area is particularly powerful under an eclipse. (9) The need for balancing of dualities, and the understanding of freedom, Equality, relationship, and love. This in reference to the persecution of gay individuals in The Solomon Islands. (10) The healing of the energies of war and death as reflected in the island of Tarawa, scene of a bloody battle in World War II when 6,000 Japanese and Americans lost their lives there. (11) The cooling, soothing energies of the mystical oceans of this planet, as the energies of Taurus love and beauty wash away all of the darkness of our history on this planet. Here we can explore the healing of the imbalances in the oceans and in nature, caused by human interference. (12) And finally, as the eclipse sweeps us back out into space and an even wider vision of earth, we take on a cosmic vision and are altered in our journey as we see the Earth, Sun and Moon in their true expression. The Sun is a star! And the Earth is a fragile, exquisite biosphere which, when viewed from space, can induce the spontaneous spiritual bliss of samahdi, a life-changing awareness of Oneness. This revelation of Earth is only possible after 4.5 million years of evolution on this remarkable blue marble suspended in black space. The Overview Effect video - released in February 2013, so it is very current - captures the concluding message of the May 9/10 eclipse in a visceral way, and it can be found here: http://vimeo.com/55073825# HERE ARE THE TIMES FOR TUNING INTO THIS ECLIPSE from the United States/Canada, and the United Kingdom. The time span for communion with the eclipse on the inner planes is approximately 5-6 hours. However, the time of most significance is the 3-4 hour window of the Annular Eclipse itself (highlighted in red). Eastern Daylight time - Thursday May 9 Eclipse energies begin: 5:25 PM Annular Eclipse begins: 6:31 PM Maximum Eclipse: 8:23 PM Annular Eclipse ends: 10:20 PM Eclipse energies end: 11:25 PM Pacific Daylight time - Thursday May 9 Eclipse energies begin: 2:25 PM Annular Eclipse begins: 3:31 PM Maximum Eclipse: 5:23 PM Annular Eclipse ends: 7:20 PM Eclipse energies end: 8:25 PM London England - Wed/Thurs May 9/10 Eclipse energies begin: 10:25 PM Annular Eclipse begins: 11:31 PM Maximum Eclipse: 1:23 AM Annular Eclipse ends: 2:20 AM Eclipse energies end: 4:25 AM You can convert the time for your location at this website: http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/converter.html We are living in a time of great change, fraught with peril but also with great beauty, and containing the ultimate opportunity to change the path of human history for the better. As we tune into this eclipse we find a wonderful real-time opportunity for the union of our consciousness and for expanding our hearts and minds. May Peace be with all of us as we enter the Red-Hot Centre Ring of Fire, an alter-dimension of purification and healing. And as we embark on this holy eclipse journey, may we raise our consciousness and, through our united focus, expand the truth of Oneness throughout the world, bringing healing and compassion to all creatures. Namaste _/|\_